I am across an old friend, the other day, who said “Do you remember when us girls went…?” My response was “YES! It was amazing. We had so much fun”.”
Since when does our fun only occur with our partner or kids?! Who said we can’t continue friendships/create new ones/reignite old connections just because we are adults and have big people responsibilities.
Do you remember how life was as a child when it was exciting to go out and do stuff with your friends?! Its not to late to get that feeling or connection back. It also does not mean we love our family any less.
I have been lucky to maintain some of my childhood friendships. They are cherished parts of my life and connections that I value.
I have learned many things from these relationships. They don’t happen over night, they take work, and they need to know they are appreciated.
Life Is Too Short…Make Time For Them:
My bestie and I try very hard to meet up once a month for coffee, dinner or go the movies. I am very grateful for our friendship. I make a point to convey that every time we get together to hang out.
I love the outings with her to be honest. I can focus on what she has to say without having to correct or tend to my kiddos. Even though, she is so awesome and comes to my house when I can’t get a sitter.
Last year we discovered a new outing…the Louisiana Book Festival. I know right!!! We are avid readers and just stumbled upon this event close to our home.
Being In The Moment:
Listening to each other is extremely important. Its vital to show that you are listening to what they have to say and actually recall previous conversations. No one likes to be ignored or pretended to be listened too.
Other than taking the occasional picture at gathering, I make the effort to be there and an active participant. There are so many moments to experience with the people around you that will not come around again.
Showing Your Appreciation:
People love to know that you appreciate them whether its by words of praise or a gift. I get excited every birthday and Christmas to buy gifts for my peeps. Sometimes its treating them to a coffee, a quick yet genuine message, a tag of something that reminds you of them or something they would like.
The bestie and I even make a book wish list (since we are both book nerds) so that we can get each other a book that we are really wanting. Sometimes its the little things that mean the most.
It’s something done intentionally that resonated the most.
The first pick was my gift to her. The second is a gift from her. Check out her blog.
Do Things Together:
Think about the “you” from high school…I can bet you are not the same person with the same interest as you were then.
Your interests have changed as well as your friends’ interests. Its important to show interest in what they enjoy. It may be intriguing to you as well. If not, you can at least give it a try and be open to new possibilities.
Its also important to experience new things with your friends.
Spouses/Partners Are Friends Too:
The hubby and I try to go out once a month on a date night. Some of those dates are doing what we love while others are trying something new. It’s a give and take…compromise.
Yes I put my hubby in this friendship post because he is my best friend. The relationships we have with our partners needs to be nourished too. They deserve our attention and effort. They are the person you are supposed to laugh with, cry with and have fun with.
When life gets busy I find they are the first people to get ignored and not on purpose.
In the immortal words of Elsa – LET IT GO:
No matter how important your frienships are to you, its important to know when stepping away is whats best.
If you have that person in your life that never gives back, feels like they are a drain on you mentall/emotionally, or is an overall black cloud over your life, then it may be time.
It totally sucks to lose a friend but are they really being a friend at this point or are they just toxic.
I totally feel you when your thinking “but they…” The thought of losing them is like losing a limb because they have been a part of your life for so long. I get it really.
Good relationships add value to your life. These friends are honest even when its not pleasant, they make you laugh, and they are there when you need an ear or a shoulder to cry on.
They are a positive light in your life and you continue to gravitate toward them.
Connect with your special peeps! — xx